


the threat is real

by marriedreylo (orphan_account)



Series: please don't shoot me for this (dystopia & abo verse) [1]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alpha Kylo Ren, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Kylo Ren Redemption, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Omega Rey (Star Wars), Worldbuilding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:20:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22374031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/marriedreylo
Summary: Kylo Ren is sick of going through his ruts alone. Rey is sick of going through her heats alone. A dystopian soulmates au with a happy ending. Heavily inspired by the Shatter Me series.**NOW COMPLETE***Don’t forget to check out the sequelhere
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Series: please don't shoot me for this (dystopia & abo verse) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1731694
Comments: 102
Kudos: 382
Collections: The Thirst Order - TWD House Swolo





	1. as long as i'm here no one can hurt you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t forget to check out the sequel when you’re done! [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24081490/chapters/57959596)

The Craigslist ad was to the point well enough, single male, thirty-two, looking for a single female to room with him. The ad said she’d need to be neat, and that he wasn’t looking for a romantic entanglement. By law, it said that he was an alpha. Rey had just suffered through her first two heats on her own, she might’ve been irreparably damaged by simply the hypothermia she’d given herself from sitting in an ice bath to cool herself. Or maybe she’d meet her end trying to buy black-market suppressants? They were expensive but worth it. There were so many ways for omegas to be seriously injured or killed these days, she wasn’t sure if it was worth it to try to avoid all of them. 

_An Alpha roommate_. Her head immediately fills with all sorts of romantic notions about a big, tall alpha taking care of her. She’d have to buy enough suppressants for at least a year, she assumed that’s how long the lease would be. 

Rey had the money for the suppressants, which she’d pickpocketed from the rich people in her town, being an omega and a small-time criminal wasn’t unheard of. She was so weak and docile looking people never expected her to take what she wanted. 

The sun was shining through the cafe window, she was currently on her old laptop, browsing through the newspaper and checking her social media, she didn’t like to have too much of a social media presence, being an omega, she was sure to attract the wrong kind of attention. She was sitting at the coffee bar, sipping from an oversized white mug, Rey was hardly tall enough to get onto the stool. 

Her little shack didn’t have cable… or electricity… or heat for that matter, at her apartment. It was merely a shack on the wrong side of town. She loved spending her only pocket money on little pastries and coffee with cream and sugar, all rarities in the current atmosphere. There had been several natural disasters which had destroyed the world’s crops, and several more monetary crises that had drained the world’s banks. Everything was going to shit, and everyone was miserable, and yet the rich persisted getting richer. 

She checked the address on the Craigslist ad and does a double-take. The address of the _penthouse_ this man was looking for a roommate with was just outside her usual coffee place. There was a phone number and the man’s name was _Kylo_. A strange name, which made her wonder if it really was his name. She only knew of one Kylo and that was Kylo Ren, the lead commander of the First Order. He was on every piece of propaganda made in the last five years. The First Order was the name of the government which had taken over after the last 2010’s election, and that was nearly 100 years ago. 

She didn’t want to get caught in some godforsaken government trap. Omegas were being harvested for the _bettering of the species_ and the horror stories were all over the news for a while, but then those were silenced too. She picks up her burner phone and dials the number. 

A man answers, “Kylo Ren speaking,” his voice sounds like a frigid winter breeze, and it occurs to her that she might be asking the wrong alpha, her heart stops, but he’s got her number now and there’s no point in hanging up. She’s not a part of the resistance, she doesn’t break any laws except for the suppressants and curfew occasionally. 

“Hello Mr. Ren. my name is Rey and I saw you placed an ad in the paper for a single female 18-25 to apply for being your roommate? I’d like to talk more with you about that.” She didn’t have suppressants on board yet and her voice seemed a little squeaky. 

“You’re a beta right?” He asks right off the bat, and she knows she has to lie. 

“Of course,” and the lie comes more easily than she thought it would, she sounds confident and the squeakiness leaves her voice. She finds it’s easy to lie when her freedom relies on it. 

“I can see you at noon, today?” He offers. “I have a one o’clock meeting but I could meet for half an hour before that.” 

Noon… that was in two hours and she would need to go to the YWCA and shower, do her hair and attempt to pinch some clean clothes. 

“Yeah, noon works,” She says, trying to make her voice sound normal. 

“Can I call you on this number in case anything comes up?” He asks politely. 

“Yes, this is my cell,” technically a lie again. 

She can hear the smile in his voice, “See you at noon at my place.” 

He hangs up and she hopes against hope she can do this right. She’d remembered, due to the sound of his alpha voice, that she had to pick up the suppressants. That was simply dropping money in a bin, and picking up the drugs around the back of the old house they sold them in. Hopefully, she wouldn’t get stopped by a safety officer. 

Rey’s on her way then, packing up her old shitty laptop, a macbook she’d pinched from on of the lockers at the gym, it was one of her most prized possessions. She had enough money for a bus ride back and forth to the small complex she lived in and back to the main part of the city. 

She needed to get those suppressants into her system in a hurry, she catches the bus and sits next to someone. He looks harmless, but she knows she reeks like an omega that just had her heat, unclean, used up omega — and then he moves away from her. Everything in this life was difficult for her, simply by nature of her being an omega. 

She walks briskly down the street after she gets off the bus and drops nearly every penny she has into the drop slot for her suppressants. The old house they sell the illegal suppressants out of is tall and looks imposing with its red-brown bricks, and steel door. It has the menacing air of a place where very clearly illegal things take place, but it’s never been raided before. The drop slot is simply a hole in the door all of which is dirty and grimy. She’s done this enough times now that they know her and give her a small discount. Then she goes around back and does the secret knock on the door, three sharp knocks and she rings the bell, then whistles. A man, old and grey, with a cigarette sticking out of his lips greets her and stuffs eight sheets of suppressant into her arms, she tucks it away in her bag and begins walking away toward her little shack. Eight sheets was a little more than a year’s worth, there were fifty or so tabs to a sheet and she needed enough for a whole year. It had cost her nearly a thousand dollars. 

She walks back to the street from the back of the house, and she makes her way onto the sidewalk, keeping her head down. It doesn’t take long for a safety officer to begin following her and after three blocks of his leering, he puts on his lights and pulls up next to her. “I’m just on my way home,” she says weakly. The officer is male and an alpha, and a little shudder goes through Rey as her hands tremble with fear. 

“Let’s see what’s in the bag, love.” She wants to run, but he has a car and he could easily outrun her and bring her to a _conditioning facility_ , her worst nightmare. She knows omegas are a precious commodity right now and she’s scared, behind her back she sends an SOS to Poe. 

“What are you doing? Show me what’s in your bag, _now_.” The officer asks, and she knows she’s in trouble, she knows if you get stopped by a safety officer you’re supposed to give them your undivided attention, she just didn’t want to end up on a milk carton. 

Rey complies and shows him the suppressants and her old laptop, because she’s an honest to god fool. 

“Those look like suppressants, dear,” and there’s a lecherous edge to his voice and she’s backing away immediately. 

He sticks his grubby, alpha hand on her, preventing her from walking away, and says, “If you get in the back and suck my cock I’ll let you keep them.” 

He said it like he was doing her a fucking favor. No, she wasn’t in heat anymore and she didn’t need an alpha. She picks up her cellphone and dials the only number in her history, _Kylo’s number._ She knows exactly what she’s doing when she picks up her phone, the officer tries to protest and she shouts at him, “I’m calling my boyfriend!” 

The officer rolls his eyes, every bit the misogynistic piece of shit he’s trying to be. 

She knows Kylo can’t scent her fear, but he should be able to hear it when she speaks, “Did something come up - are you ok?” He asks, and she recognizes the tone of his voice changed on the phrase _are you ok_. He’s in rut. 

She does use her omega voice this time, because it’s the only way she’ll be able to convince him to come save her. “I’m in a bad part of town and a safety officer is giving me a hard time… a very hard time,” she looks over at the officer accusingly. 

Kylo’s end of the phone is silent for a long beat, and then he says, “Is this a burner phone? Tell me where you are. I can’t ping your GPS coordinates if it’s a burner.” 

His voice is all alpha and she feels the need to tell the truth again, “Yeah, it’s a burner phone, I’m on the corner of Lark and Johnson, in the Jakku district.” 

There’s some muffled swearing and the sound of keys jingling, “Tell the safety officer, _Commander Kylo Ren_ is coming to get you.” 

He hangs up, and all the breath is sucked from her lungs, she begins to cry, because this will surely be messy as hell, but why would he come get her? He doesn’t even know her! She’d gone out on a limb and it had worked, gloriously so, but she _did not_ want to room with anyone in the First Order. 

She turns her attention back to the safety officer, who is gaping at her, “Commander Kylo is coming to get me, he’s my roommate.” 

The safety officer looks taken aback and then he outright laughs at her. “The Commander is _not_ a pathetic little omega’s roommate! He doesn’t need a goddamn roommate,” he laughs, “I was born at night, you know kid, but not _last night!_ ” 

“Please just give me ten minutes for him to show up and if he doesn’t, I’ll give you whatever you want.” _Just let me keep the suppressants_. She begs in her mind. 

The officer allows it… and she waits. 

*~*~* 

Kylo takes a minute to plug in the address to his smartphone and gets in his Ferrari. She’s an omega, and if he’s not mistaken… she’s an omega who just had her heat. Which should mean it’s safe for him to be around her… but nothing about this feels safe. 

The First Order commander drives as fast as the traffic will let him. And when he arrives, it’s to a perverted safety officer forcefully trying to put Rey in the back of a police cruiser. He jogs up to the car and speaks to the officers about the girl, and that’s what she is, if she’s a day over twenty-one he’ll eat his hat. Rey’s left standing there, looking up at him, rubbing her wrists which they’d put into handcuffs. It’s the first time he’s looked into her eyes, and something horrible happens then. 

He imprints on her. 

He can only see her, only their future together, a beautiful wedding with thousands of white flowers, her belly swollen with twins, and an image of them looking out over the Rocky Mountains, the colors overwhelm him, and even though it’s only an imprinting vision, it feels so real. 

His heart sinks because it can’t be true, that can’t be his path, his soul is too dark, he’s hurt too many people. The vision is there and gone in a second, but the dark shadow of emotion remains cast over his heart. 

And then he’s stumbling forward to help her, knowing he has to forget everything he’s seen, everything he’s felt for her in those few seconds because she will never want to be with him if she knows he’s imprinted on her. 

He comes to himself and hauls her into his arms, “She’s with me.” He says, using an alpha voice, which brooks no argument. He knows he’s big, even for an alpha. 

No one argues, and Kylo makes a mental note of the guys badge number so he can have him fired. She looks at his fire engine red Ferrari with wide eyes, and he opens the door for her. She climbs in, sinking into the plush leather seats and he gets in and he says, “You’ve got a lot of explaining to do.” 


	2. she don't like roses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo discovers that hiding this particular secret will be much more difficult than he imagined. Rey shoves Kylo into a pool for his trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so long! I'm going through kind of a hard time rn, but personal turmoil aside this is one of my favorite things to write, that i've ever written! thank you for all the comments, bookmarks, and subscriptions!

*~*~* 

CHAPTER 2 

*~*~*

The Ferrari weaves through traffic at an alarming pace, the buildings were going by at a frightening rate. Rey is holding onto the edge of her seat, literally. He seems perfectly comfortable with the car, though, and it’s a little obnoxious. 

“So what’s your excuse?” Kylo finally asks, he’s not using his alpha voice - but there’s an edge to his voice which speaks to his ire. 

They’re heading into the heart of the city, and it’s making her nervous. She can see the painful bulge in his pants, and she’s doing her best to ignore it, “You’re in a Rut.” 

Kylo’s hands tighten on the steering wheel, “Yeah? You’re supposed to be in an omega facility. If you think I can keep you safe from that, you’re looking at the wrong person.”

Omega facility. She cringes away from him, the scent of his pheromones is going to her head. Omega facilities were where omegas were kept and “trained” for their prospective new mates. It was all too horrible to think about. “You’re taking me to a facility then?” She asks. 

“No,” his voice is hollow, and he doesn’t explain why, simply keeps driving. They’re in the crowded city of New York now, or at least what’s left of it. Rey can remember a time when people were still trying to bring back the trees in Central Park. She’d barely been old enough to remember the smell of spring rain and mud, and she has the faintest memories of a man with dirty blonde hair and a woman with rich brown eyes. Everything good in this world was nothing but a memory.

“Please tell me where we’re going…” Rey will beg if she has to, she hates how weak she sounds. 

Kylo begins slowing the car, and they turn into a parking garage. She knows she’s in for it. Kylo’s out of the car in a second, and then he’s at her door, because she’s trying to lock herself in the car. He shouts through the glass, “The longer you do that, the longer you’re at risk!” 

At risk. She wondered if there was such a thing as not being at risk. What was at stake? Too much - her freedom, her life, her wellbeing. 

Finally he uses the key fob and yanks her out of the car roughly, but not hard enough to hurt. He walks her to the elevators in the parking garage, this seems to be an urban residential neighborhood. This was the Capital, the hub of everything wrong with North America. She’s shaking like a leaf. She looks over to Kylo, and sees he’s fidgeting with his smartphone. He’s not using it, just tossing it back and forth casually between one massive hand and the other. It speaks to his absurd wealth that he would treat an expensive phone with such carelessness. 

There’s something going on that she’s not aware of, and it’s deeply bothering her. The elevator goes ding and announces that they are at the twentieth floor of sector forty-five headquarters. Fuck. Shit. Damn. She uses her omega voice then, “Please, alpha, don’t make me go in there.” 

Kylo drops his phone and the screen shatters, if he’s pissed off about this, he doesn’t let on, because he simply scoops the phone up and takes her by the shoulder and leads her inside. She knows if she tries to run now, she’s either dead or in a facility - and that’s not ok. The scent of his pheromones (he smells like a harsh winter breeze, clean linen, and evergreens) are making her brain a little haywire. He seems to possess a remarkable amount of control for an alpha though, because, besides yanking her out of the car, he hasn’t touched her. She can’t stop thinking about the bulge he’d had in the car, which had both disgusted her and make her want to kiss him senseless. 

They’re walking through the building, passing through what looks like the safety officer’s barracks. She didn’t know why they were called safety officers, they were decidedly not safe to talk to or interact with, and were glorified soldiers. They were allowed to carry semi-automatic and fully automatic weapons. If there was anything safe about that, then someone had a pretty sick sense of humor. 

The building has opulent marble floors, inlaid with gold. There are pillars and the words  _ vicits honor _ were written in a looping scrawl on a mural in the front hallway. Honor to the fallen. The whole place smells sterile. “You want to see the penthouse?” Kylo asks. 

“What?” Rey stops in her tracks. “Is this...” she looks at the address he gave as his residence. “This isn’t the address in your ad!” She says a little shrilly.

“I wasn’t expecting any omegas to respond to my ad, to be quite honest, because of obvious reasons. And I couldn’t very well advertise I was looking for a roommate for the Commander of the First Order. However, you’re here now, and I’ve got to work with it. You shouldn’t be seen down here, so why don’t you follow me, Rey,” Kylo’s voice was easy, relaxed even, and it was throwing her for a loop. 

She’s had enough shocks for today to last a lifetime. They passed some soldiers, who were clearly betas, because they didn’t give her a second glance. After walking through a series of wide hallways that were richly decorated in reds and darker tones, they came to an elevator. He looks into a slot, putting his chin in a small stand, which was clearly designed for a retina scanner. She’s already terrified, but this is worse than she’d thought it would be. This must be the  _ penthouse _ he’d been advertising. She grudgingly gets into the elevator, which is small and glass, from the top to bottom. They begin rising off the ground and Kylo says, “You might want to look at the view.” 

She’s about to snap at him that she doesn’t want to see the view of this ruined city, but there’s no escaping the view, which… she’s fumbling for words to describe. The sidewalks are solid granite and something metallic glints off them in little veins. The buildings are all glass, from top to bottom, and there’s food venders and she can almost  _ smell  _ the freshly brewed coffee, which she’s sure has been imported from far, far away. The thought makes her blood run cold, because her world was no longer able to produce enough food, and water was being fought over with deadly consequences. A shudder goes through her and she’s pulled from her reverie when the elevator  _ dings _ . 

Kylo leads her into what is definitely his penthouse. She’s fuming, how could there be such disparity? How could he live like this when she was barely surviving? Anger coils in her gut, and her fists clench by her sides. She clenches her teeth, and when they get inside, he vaguely waves toward the sofa, and grumbles something like ‘make yourself at home’ and then disappears deep into the penthouse. There’s something  _ wrong _ about this. If Kylo hadn’t had to come to get her, things could’ve ended very badly for her. Maybe she had a really good omega voice, or maybe there was another exclamation. She suspects she knows what he’s doing in the back, but luckily he’s chosen a room far enough away for her to not hear him getting off. Ruts only lasted a day or so, unless there was an omega in heat around, and then they’d last about a week, less if the alpha gave into their desires. 

Rey sits down on the sofa, which is a black leather number,  _ clearly  _ not made for comfort. It hardly moves at all when she sits on it. There are several wingback chairs, and what appeared to be a crystal decanter set on a fancy looking all glass coffee table. There was a small box, which she dared not to touch, but unless she was mistaken it was a tin of cigarettes. Cigarettes were an item that only the  _ absurdly _ wealthy could afford. In the southern and midwest parts of the country, the farmland had been decimated by locusts and fires. When religion had still been allowed, some blamed it on God’s wrath. Rey had never been a very spiritual person, and she was glad for that, because the thought of a jealous God lording over the earth while people died day in and day out was too much to handle.

She hears him start walking back to her, long before she actually sees him. He looks a little ruffled. She’s just glad he didn’t ask  _ her _ to help get him off, because she surely would’ve bitten off his dick. “So… what now?” She asked, trying to keep things strictly business. 

“Now? Now I need to buy you some suppressants, which, by the way, is a hanging offense in this country.” His tone is sharp, like the sound of a whip snapping. 

She cringes visibly, she’s torn between being honest and flat out lying. The cop hadn’t taken her suppressants. They’d just harassed her. She opens her bag and pulls the suppressants out, and Kylo groans loudly. “You cannot be serious.” 

“That’s why I got in trouble, I bought enough for a year, because I figured that was how long the lease would be. and I thought I could earn the rent… another way.” Her cheeks flame red, and she looks away. 

Kylo gives her a calculating look, “I should have you arrested.” 

“You were just saying—“ 

“I  _ know _ what I said, which, by the by, had better never leave this room.” He huffs indignantly and then looks at the suppressants, “You know if you take those for long enough you’ll never be able to have pups?” 

She’s still looking away from him, her hands in her lap, and she’s fidgeting with a small, round stone, which she often kept tucked inside a secret pocket in her jacket. She knows she will never bare pups, because there isn’t an alpha in the world that could make her feel safe enough to be vulnerable with someone. 

He doesn’t take kindly to her silence, and he snags the stone from her hands. There’s a short inscription on the stone, which is now clearly a worry stone. “ _ There is no true loss while there is love and memory. _ ” He reads aloud. “Who did you steal this from?” He asks, and then tacks on, “Who did you steal from to get  _ that _ many suppressants?” He begins pacing, apparently he’s worried about something, and she knows it’s not her wellbeing. 

She wonders if she could just run, or grab one of the crystal decanters and smash it over his head. Rage burns through her at such a fierce pace, it feels like she’s turning to ash. “How am I supposed to survive, with all your stupid laws about not letting omegas be employed  _ or _ educated! How is anyone who’s not sympathetic to your fucking dictatorship supposed to eat? I have no choice but to steal everything I need for basic necessities! This isn’t living, and it’s barely existing. So, I’m sorry, if I was going to whore myself out to you so I could live without fear of being arrested, detained and sent to an internment camp!” 

She must’ve said something that touched on a nerve, because his face is contorted in a mask of agony, but it’s there and gone in a second. He runs a hand through his beautiful black hair, and she wonders if his hair is soft or coarse, and she wonders how it would feel between her fingers. He’s all man, and she’d have to be blind to not recognize his visual appeal. 

“So I think we should have some rules,” He says and he’s leaning forward, his head in his hands. “First of all, you need take those suppressants everyday, second of all, don’t touch my lightsaber.” 

“I had no intention of touching your lightsaber.” Rey snarls, but she realizes a moment too late that she’d made the innuendo when he hadn’t. 

Kylo’s eyebrows quirk, “No I meant my actual lightsaber. I was a Sith Lord long before I was a Commander for the First Order.” His face flushes, and she realizes he’d told her more than he’d meant to, it was common knowledge that Kylo Ren was the worst (and most effective) member of the First Order for making the people’s lives hell. Only Armitage Hux and Snoke had a worse reputation. 

She looks away from him, unable to meet his gaze, and then she says, shakily, to no one but herself, “You’re a monster.” 

“We're all monsters, Rey, some of us just hide it better than others,” his voice is tired and strained. 

Rey thought about that for a long moment, she wasn’t the most morally upstanding member of society, but the society they were living in was so skewed toward those who already had more than they would ever need. 

“Maybe, but I did what I had to do to survive, your job is far more heinous than stealing a few credits.” 

Kylo stretches out his long legs in front of him, “I don’t want to talk about this.” 

Rey’s face twists, displeased with the fact that he won’t give more away, “You should show me around.” She fiddles with a spare piece of string, hanging off her threadbare clothes. 

Kylo nods, and springs to his feet, “There’s not much to see.”

It’s the single most untrue thing she thinks she’ll ever hear, and tour makes her more angry than she’d ever thought possible. Her fists are clenched at her sides, her face red and her pulse is roaring in her ears. 

“Watch the floor in here, they just cleaned the pool.” He says before opening a swinging door in the very back of the Penthouse. 

The pool, the fucking pool. She’s about to refuse to see anymore of this nightmare but the door swings open and she can’t help what happens next. They’re walking close to the edge, and he’s bending over the water, checking the temperature and she takes her boot and applies it to his back with some force. He yelps and with a splash he’s knocked into the 90 degree pool water. He comes up spluttering, looking slightly murderous. 

“What the fuck?” Kylo groans as he realizes the expensive suit he was wearing is now ruined. 

“Maybe you should just wear money next time!” Rey shouts angrily, “It would dry easier than your stupid suit!” 

Kylo is already halfway out of the pool, and she’s ready to back away from him, ready to throw herself out a window, rather than be near this monster. His Prada dress shoes squelch unpleasantly on the tile floor as he comes toward her. His shoulder length hair is matted to his head and he looks absolutely feral. He doesn’t say anything, which scares her the most. Because she tried to back away from him she’s now backed into a corner, and his arms go on either side of her, caging her in. He’s easily a foot taller than her, and about a hundred pounds more of raw, unadulterated power. A shiver runs down her spine and she knows she’s in for it. 

He presses his huge palm to her throat, and she inhales as deeply as she can, he’s not cutting off her oxygen supply, but he’s definitely limited it. 

“You will act as a civil human being in my presence, or you can get the hell out.” 

She stubbornly doesn’t even acknowledge him, just bares her throat to him, his hard cock is digging into her hip, and the thought of this man, this horrible person, fucking her roughly right here, sends a wave of heat through her bones. She manages to inhale enough air that she can speak, “You disgust me.” 

But then she’s pulling him down to her height, and her fingers are in his hair, and kissing him as if he’s the only one left on Earth. The world turns and it is only them, the night sky and her stars. He’s teasing the soft skin of her lower lip between his teeth, and a little whine, entirely omega in nature, is pulled from her lips. 

He’s in rut, and maybe kissing him wasn’t the best idea, but they stand there, his hand now beginning to drift down to her breast, and massage it slightly. She kisses him deeper, their tongues tangle and she feels as if this is what all her pain and suffering has been leading up to, a purpose.

She was going to bring down the First Order, one kiss at a time, and it began today.


	3. ready for the threat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Rey have it out. He's not as easy to provoke as she'd hoped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shout out to [Heathyr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyJediLife/pseuds/MyJediLife) and [Osso](https://archiveofourown.org/users/onesmallstep0/pseuds/onesmallstep0) for their alpha and beta work! I'm so happy to call both of you my friends! Any mistakes made are mine!

*~*~* 

CHAPTER 3 

*~*~*

It’s been forty-eight hours since the Kiss Incident, and Kylo seems to be making himself as scarce as possible. He comes back late at night and leaves early in the morning. Attending to whatever makerforsaken task he’s doing now. She doesn’t know how to act around him, she’s torn between being the perfect omega and rebelling against the darkness that is clearly present in their interactions. 

So when he comes home early, at only six o’clock she tries to make herself scarce. 

Kylo doesn’t bother to try to find her but does blast some hardcore metal on his Bluetooth speaker. 

She can deal with this… it’s fine if he wants to be this way. She doesn’t want any part of it. 

That’s the mantra she keeps telling herself after an hour of Chevelle, Breaking Benjamin and some newer things play. She’s listened to the lyrics, how could she not? They’re all about ex’s and hoe’s which gives her an unpleasant thought, did Kylo have lady friends? A thought comes unbidden to her, what if one of those lady friends discovered her here? The game would be up, and she’d be carted off to an omega facility. The thought physically pains her. 

There’s a knock on the bedroom door and she realizes things have gone quiet, a moment too late. “I’m going to assume you’re still alive?” Kylo says through the door, which she doesn’t open for him. 

“That’s a good assumption,” she says, without opening the door. 

“I’m -- uhm -- still in rut, so if you need me, I’ll be late tonight.” 

Rey colors up, immediately, and cracks the door, “You’re… going to bring someone back here?” 

Rey knows she sounds squeaky, and a little concerned. She notices that Kylo has his lightsaber and blaster at his hip, and she wonders if he’s expecting trouble. She catches herself checking out his slim hips and powerful thighs, and cringes. 

“You know you don’t have to act like I’m—” Kylo begins, but she cuts him off. 

“My enemy?” She snaps, “You  _ are _ my enemy, or did you forget that?” 

He scoffs, “ _Oh,_ _trust me_ I know that and I’m not bringing someone back here, but I need to go stomp out a small force of rebellion—“ He pauses, realizing that he’s said too much. 

She’s reaching forward to slap him, but she’s too slow for his reflexes, he catches her by the wrist, and she feels a strange feeling of calm and then… a vision. 

They are on the beach, someplace not stateside, he’s on one knee, a beautiful heirloom ring between his fingers, tears rolling down his face. The waves of the ocean crash against the beach and time seems to stop. She says  _ yes _ . But then the vision switches to their wedding and she looks so stupidly happy. Rey is frozen in place, she can’t help but watch as she realizes this is an imprinting vision, and she feels rage building up in her veins while she realizes that she will marry this  _ monster _ . 

She tugs her wrist out of his grip as soon as the vision ends. He’s giving her a look, a look that says, he  _ knows _ and that makes her simply boil with rage. 

“We need to talk,” Kylo begins saying, but she’s got his saber unclipped from his belt, and she’s pointing it at his chest, with it off. 

A tremor goes through her, and she feels the entirety of the Force moving through her small body, and then she feels something sharp and edged with teeth working it’s way up to the surface. 

She touches the wall for support and it crumbles beneath her fingers. She is destruction made manifest in human flesh. 

His lightsaber doesn’t seem affected, and she reaches to touch him, to  _ ruin _ him, as he’s ruined her soul, but he leans in as if he wants to meet his end. But nothing happens as her small hand touches his face. He smiles a shark’s smile at her. 

She is a  _ ruiner _ . 

She moves to run past him, and he’s got his lightsaber back in hand, “Wait!” 

Rey is so beside herself she doesn’t give much thought to the elevator button which she’s now destroyed. Over her shoulder, she hears the crackling of the cracked kyber crystal in his saber, “If you go out there now and cause havoc I’ll have no choice.” 

She turns on her heel, now well and truly stuck, since the elevator is broken, “Go ahead.” Her voice is low and sounds caustic as acid, “Go ahead and end my life, maker knows it’ll be a blessing to not have to occupy the same space as—“ 

“Don’t finish that sentence. Don’t  _ ever _ think you know me when you clearly do not.” 

She steps closer to his lightsaber, so the crackling energy of it is nearly touching her skin, “Kylo, that future? The one where we’re married? It died a long time ago.” 

Kylo steps away, and turns off his lightsaber, “Let the past die, kill it if you have to, maker knows I’ve been looking for an excuse to leave the First Order behind for  _ years _ .” 

Rey gives him a confused glance, “I read… I mean, you were at the heart of it all, the founding of the First Order, your whole family was?” The end of her words hang in the shape of a question mark, and she wonders if propaganda is just that, pretty lies made to make the general public believe the shiny veneer of the dictatorship. 

He scoffs and flips his lightsaber, which is off, in his hand. “You need to get your powers with the force under control, or you’re seriously going to hurt someone.  _ You need a teacher _ .” 

She’s immediately on her guard, “I don’t need you!” She spits at him, the venom in her voice tangible. “ _ No one _ needs you.” She can’t believe she’s speaking such words to the man who is her mate, her makergiven soulmate, as it were. She’s so angry, and because of this, she doesn’t realize that she’s sending all these feelings down their newly formed bond, and she’s overwhelming them both. 

Kylo gasps as the full weight of her hatred hits him, “You really think the worst of me, don’t you?” 

“Always,” Rey turns to walk away from him, and it’s never felt more wrong to turn her back on someone, so when he turns her into his arms, she feels her biology kicking in,  _ you are safe with the alpha, with your mate _ ,  _ he would rather die than put you in harms way _ . She hates the logical voice in her head, and when she curls into his chest, her small omega body fitting into the shape of him, she lets out a shuddering sigh. 

“I won't go, if you ask me to stay,” Kylo says, his voice is fraught with tension and he feels close to feral with worry for her. 

Rey wants to be cruel to him, wants him to be mean to her, as she knows, or thought she knew, he can be. “I don’t want you to go, but I can’t ask you to stay.” She felt like she was at war with herself. 

He hugs her tighter and kisses her hair, a tender gesture that seems out of place, given the intensity, and animosity of their previous interactions. 

She steps away from him and gently touches the wall, which turns to ash under her palm. “What does  _ that _ mean?” 

Kylo sighs and holds her out in his arms, “It means the Force runs incredibly strong in you, and…” he pauses, and seems to be mulling over the words in his head, “it seems your force abilities are corrupted.” 

She seems to wilt in his arms as quickly as a plant given saltwater, “But… I’m an orphan, I’ve never… I was never trained or tested.” 

“You’re incredibly dangerous, Rey.” 

She frowns, and then curls into him again, “But I’m not hurting you?” 

“No, not even a little, not even when you want to.” 

She lets the tears come then, and at some point, everything goes black, she’s exhausted, and she knows that in her mates arms is where she belongs. 

*~*~* 

Rey wakes with a start in the night, she realizes she’s in the room she took as her own. She looks around and finds Kylo slumped in a chair, on the other side of the spacious room. He’s snoring slightly, as she pads out of the room, her hand brushes the door frame and it cracks and turns to dust, she feels bad about ruining his beautiful home, but she was going to do something foolish if she didn’t get out of that room. She was going to get him to sleep in her bed, which at this point, could be a huge mistake. 

She quickly realizes that she can’t touch  _ anything _ without destroying it. She lays waste to two glasses and lets out a frustrated growl when she realizes getting the orange juice she’d wanted is now out of the question. 

There’s a bleary yawn in the doorway, and the french doors open, and Kylo is standing there, a frown on his face. “Come back to bed,” he groans, “It’s like four in the morning.” 

“I’m thirsty,” how does she explain she can’t even do basic tasks, because of her corrupted force ability? If that’s even what it is. 

Kylo gives her a bored look, “The glasses are in the third cupboard to the—“ he inhales sharply as he realizes their current predicament, “Fuck.” 

She hangs her head, “Now you see?” 

He runs a hand through his hair, clearly trying to work this out, “Hold on.” He disappears for a few minutes and reappears with a pair of black leather gloves, they’re well worn, and look like they must be his… he slides them over her hands before she can protest, and the gloves don’t disintegrate so that’s a start. 

“Try to touch something,” he asks her. 

She frowns, but plucks a glass out of the cupboard and… nothing. It doesn’t crumble, and she doesn’t feel the Force working through her with such force she thinks she will be ill. 

She looks up at him through her lashes, with big doe eyes, and whispers, “Thank you.” 

Kylo looks like he wants to touch her, hold her maybe, but he looks away, out the window and she feels his rejection. 

“Are we still enemies?” He asks, not meeting her gaze. 

“I don’t think there’s anything else I could hope to be to you,” Rey says quietly.

Pain, so much pain, plays across his face, “Just thought I’d ask.” 

*~*~*

A week passes, and Kylo seems to have slipped back into his rhythm, although he sleeps in the armchair in my room, every night. She almost feels bad when he complains of a stiff neck on one Friday afternoon. She hasn’t taken off the gloves he’s given her. They are the only protection she can offer the world from her destructive tendencies. 

“Snoke wants to see you,” He says gently over his coffee, later the same morning. 

“No.” She says flatly. 

“It’s not up for discussion,” Kylo says, stirring cream into his coffee. 

“The hell it’s not!” Rey snaps at him and she slams her fist down on the mahogany table. 

He rubs his temples, clearly, he’s getting a headache, probably induced from a week’s worth of sleeping upright, which is completely his own fault. 

“Rey, he’s not going to hurt you,” Kylo says, a bit too calmly. 

She’s red at the tips of her ears and cheeks, and she doesn’t understand how this could possibly be alright, “You’re not telling me something,” she surmises. 

He nods, “You’re not going to wear the gloves when you meet him,” he says quietly. 

Her jaw drops and she feels panic climbing through her bones, “You want me… to…  _ destroy  _ him?” 

“Why not? Isn’t that what you want?” 

Rey makes an omega noise of discontent, similar to a groan, “I’m no murderer.” 

Kylo rises to challenge, “So you don’t want to take down the person who’s ruined your life, and the lives of so many?” He makes a  _ tsking _ noise, “More for me then.” 

She looks at him, and it’s almost as if she’s seeing through him, to the boy who’s trapped behind the menace, “I know you’re going to try to take his place as Supreme Leader, probably before his body is ash, and I don’t want that.” 

Kylo attempts to hide behind his coffee mug, which is comical given his size, he’s leaning slightly away from her, “So you don’t think I will be a better leader?” 

Rey sighs deeply, sounding annoyed, and slips from the room. 

She goes and lays down and Kylo does not follow. 


	4. be clear, be clear, be clear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snoke deserves everything terrible in this word.

*~*~*

CHAPTER 4

*~*~*

It is later in the week, in the morning, when Rey wakes to find that there is a short missive left taped to her nightstand. Kylo’s writing is looping and scrawling where she’d thought it would be slanting and scratch-like. 

_ Get the suit out of your closet, put it on, make sure you’re wearing your gloves, and at noon we’re having lunch with Snoke. Be prepared.  _

_ Great! _ She hadn’t even agreed to this stupid charade! He was her mate, and she would die trying to defy him, but not today, today they were on the same side for once. It’s a strange thing to fight for someone when you don’t even know their motives, which is why when Rey touches the suit and feels the suit amplify her powers a hundred fold, she grins and barrels head first into this little venture. It’s a bodysuit, except it covers her from the high collar to her toes, made of some kind of slinky fabric. The suit is not destroyed by her bare skin, which means Kylo has done some research. Does the man ever sleep? She doubted it, and if she were him she wouldn’t sleep either. 

The suit has a little card of instructions on it,  _ wear with no other clothing, shower after using _ . She quirks her brow at that, it’s a bit strange instruction. She feels a pang of longing go through her at the thought of Kylo wearing his usual cowl and cape. She has thought and dreamed about it, and knows they would be good at hatefucking each other, and maybe it would take the tension out of their interactions. 

She looked at the clock and realized it was 11:37, and she only had twenty-three minutes to tame her long hair and deal with her face. She goes into the bathroom and finds all manner of war paint (makeup) and begins applying it at a dizzying rate. She runs a brush through her hair, finds some dry shampoo and sprays it into her roots, which are fine, given that she showered yesterday.  _ What would he have done if she slept in? _ She snorts at the thought of it and begins working the product through her hair. Then, she begins applying some simply BB cream, and winged liner, mascara and shadow. There’s a honk downstairs as she finishes her left eye’s shadow and winged liner. Damn Kylo and his male expectations. 

She goes down in the elevator and catches a glimpse of her reflection in one of the mirrors in the lobby, her winged liner is sharp enough to kill a man, and the body suit is making her petite body look like she’s a runway model. 

She slides into the backseat of the limousine and catches the drivers look of panic when he sees her. The suit seems to protect her from accidentally discharging her power, but how does she—

She is blindsided by Kylo, and her eyes go from his red bottom shoes and his slacks, up to his face, which is etched in an unusual, coy smirk.

“You look,” Kylo shakes his head, “you look like a woman out for blood,” there’s a catch in his voice, and she wonders if he knows how true that is. 

She smiles back at him, a serpentine smile which she can see him shiver at, “You look amazing.” 

His cheeks flush and he offers her a water, then he slides up the privacy screen and retrieves a blaster, his crossguard lightsaber, and throwing stars. She wants to congratulate him on being armed to the teeth, but then a thought occurs to her, “Where’s  _ my weapons? _ ” She’s a little annoyed. 

He glances up at her, “You  _ are _ the weapon,  _ darling _ .” 

The sound of the word darling coming off his lips is melodic and deep, and her pussy gives a hollow little tug. Her heat is coming in a week, and it’s likely she’ll give into him before then. It’s a long drive, then a short ride up an elevator to the Supreme Leader’s dining room. It’s not his personal dining room, of course, it’s simply the room he uses for meeting business associates. 

Snoke is… detestable. He’s an old man, who doesn’t bother to hide it when he checks out Rey’s tits. His face has a long scar on it, which she’s heard rumors of. Supposedly he got it unseating the last Supreme Leader, which must’ve been many years ago. Kylo kneels and bows his head to Snoke, Rey belatedly does the same. 

“She’s a pretty one, Ren,” Snoke says after they have gone through the proper greetings. Kylo is just pulling out Rey’s chair for her, when Snoke makes a pointed comment about Rey’s outfit, “If you wanted to have a whore at lunch to share, you should’ve told me,” Snoke laughs. Rey’s cheeks go pink, and she curls in on herself. 

Kylo gives him a man-eating smile, “Oh, she’s a real treasure, this one, she’s got some tricks up her sleeve.” 

Lunch is a showcase of opulence, there’s oysters, lobster, steak and all manner of the most expensive food imaginable. Kylo has the steak and a salad, and Rey can barely manage to push the food around her plate. It’s disgusting that they can eat like this and not care about the people in her position, who are dying and suffering endlessly so that these people can eat  _ lobster _ . 

Snoke seems to pick up on Rey’s distress, and when they’re done eating, he calls for dessert wine, and Rey puts the glass to her lips but doesn’t drink. Kylo seems to be doing the same, it must be nearly showtime. 

Kylo turns the conversation to his purpose, “You know Rey is a cosmetologist, she can make that scar go away.” 

Snoke gives her a look, and she feels her skin crawl under his scrutiny, “Come here,” and Snoke pats his lap. She makes a show of taking off her gloves, then approaches him as she channels her energy through her fingers, and thinks of energy coursing into his body. Everything is happening in the slowest of movements. Her fingers touch the lumpy skin of his face, which is acne-scarred, and she wonders if nothing will happen, but then his face is disintegrating, and she is truly a ruiner. His whole body shudders and a half scream is pulled from his lips, but it dies just as surely as he does. The ruining power of her corrupted force powers makes her a weapon, just as surely as the cracked kyber crystal in Kylo’s saber makes it a weapon. 

Speaking of his saber - it’s ignited, and the Praetorian Guards have their blasters trained on Rey. He doesn’t so much as blink when he discharges his blaster, firing a stream of blaster bolts to offer her cover. Somehow they’d ended up being back to back. She can feel something horrible shifting inside her, her corrupted force powers are worsening, and she screams as force lightning is ripped from her body, hitting each of the guards squarely in the chest. 

A blood-curdling scream works from her lips, and she begins to panic. It’s just them, and one room over is the throne room, the room where Kylo will rule the fate of the (somewhat) free world. 

“Mate,” she says hoarsely, “K-Kylo,” she stammers, she feels ill and nearly collapses, but she feels Kylo’s corded arms on her holding her up, consoling her. 

The room is frighteningly silent, and she can hear their combined panting breath. “Can you stand?” Kylo asks softly as if he’s trying not to break her by speaking too loudly. 

“I killed them — I killed them all — Kylo, I’m a  _ monster _ .” Rey feels herself coming down from the incredible pain the force lightning had caused, and the crash will most likely debilitate her. 

“You’re no more a monster than I am.” He says soothingly. They are standing among dead bodies, they  _ are _ monsters. But maybe - just maybe - they can be monsters  _ together. _

_ *~*~*  _

Getting Rey calmed down and sending out the word that Kylo was now Supreme Leader takes the rest of the day. Rey is in a state of near exhaustion when she crawls into the bed in the Supreme Suite. She suspects that Kylo will make himself scarce. 

It’s midnight when she wakes to soaked sheets,  _ fuck, fuck, fuck.  _ She hadn’t taken her blockers for  _ days, _ and it had simply ceased to be something she thought about because she’d been so on guard.  _ So afraid. _ She was getting to the point where she realized there was a clear picture of her future with Kylo. They would rule together, and she would turn him after a time. She was sure of it. 

This vision does nothing to quell the horrible emptiness between her legs. Kylo slips into the room at that exact moment, and her omega senses begin tingling too, they both smell like exhaustion - and she scents vague arousal on him. She jumps out of the bed, and Kylo groans low in his throat.  _ No, no, no _ ! She wasn’t due for another heat for…. weeks! She begins cursing loudly in the adjoining bathroom and barricades herself into the room, fuck, how had this slipped past her? She doesn’t want to ruin what had sparked between her and Kylo earlier today with her infernal heats. She didn’t know what had caused it, and she wasn’t into the madness of her heat just yet, but she was close. She thinks it might’ve been her corrupted force power, but that’s  _ ridiculous _ . The force had nothing to do with her being an omega. 

She casts her mind back to today’s activities, there had been a lot of comforting on both their parts, and she’d had a moment with Kylo, but they hadn’t even kissed! Maybe it was the fact that she accepted he wasn’t all monster, and there was some of the boy who was brilliantly gifted with the force and scared and exhausted. She didn’t know the full story, and she couldn’t ask for it now, not when she was going to spend the next five days locked in here. 

There’s a knock on the door, and she knows, it’s  _ him _ . “I can smell you from here,” Kylo coos, he’s using his deep, deep, alpha voice - and it’s making her crazy. 

“I-I’m about to be in heat,” she stammers, willing him away from the door, “please, I don’t want to ruin this… whatever is between us won’t survive my heat, if you—“ 

“You’ve been through enough heats alone, sweetheart, let me help you.” She wilts slightly at this, she can sense he’s waiting impatiently on the other side of the door.

Her body is physically bending toward the door, she longs for him, whatever is going on right now, there’s only one way to not be in agony for the next several days. She moves the stuff blocking the door, and pushes the lock open. Kylo is looking at her quivering body, and he leads her to the bed. 

“If you don’t want to, we don’t have to,” he says, “I would never force you.” 

She swallows hard, “I know you wouldn’t, I know you’re not like that. But…  _ I don’t want it to mean anything.  _ I want to keep being your enemy. Because the alternative is so much harder.” 

Kylo drops a kiss to her hair, the room is swimming with pheromones, “I’ll be who you want me to be for as long as you like.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sigh* sorry about the cliffy. sexy times next chapter, my loves! my beta is MyJediLife, definitely go check her stuff out!


	5. a little more

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey struggle to remain enemies, and Ben has a bad day. The Prince of Alderaan is discovered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, this is basically 2k words of smut. *shrugs into infinity* Please remember this is an abo fic and if you don't want graphic smut now's the time to leave.

They start out slow, he kisses her and she thinks it will last forever. She hopes it does because he’s an excellent kisser. She’s kissed other people, of course. It’s not her first kiss, but her kisses before this one were mere pecks. This is deep, this is real. It seems like all the oxygen in the room is being absorbed by them. She sucks in a breath, chest heaving, and wraps her arms around his neck, “Take me to bed.” She begs him. 

Slick is now coating her thighs - which feels glorious under the circumstances. Kylo has a bulge in his pants, and she feels a slight note of pride in her chest. She made the big, bad Kylo Ren feel something like lust? Her power! 

He picks her up and carries her to the bed, depositing her on impossibly soft sheets. She is aching for him. “Rey, your heart’s beating so fast.” He whispers to her, as he climbs on top of her, “I can hear it.” 

She swallows hard, she’s not technically a virgin in the strictest sense of the word, she’d used toys and didn’t technically have a cherry to pop, but this would certainly be her first time having… sex. She wished she could’ve been innocent for this, but being an omega had robbed her of that. Ten thousand thoughts fly through her head as she realizes she hasn’t responded. “I’m scared, Kylo.” She says frankly, she’s scared, yes, but also excited. 

He kisses her soundly, effectively quieting her. “I told you I’d be whoever you wanted me to be. I don’t have to be Kylo in this room. Don’t think of me like  _ that _ . I’m here to make this easier for you, not harder.” His voice was uncharacteristically tender. She knows they’ll go back to fighting after the next five days are over. She doesn’t want anything to change, it  _ cannot _ change. Rey can’t go dark. 

Rey nods and removes his shirt, her gloves are off, and yet the material doesn’t crumble under her fingers. She quirks an eyebrow and Kylo shrugs off the shirt. 

_ Holy -  _ Kylo Ren is shredded. Her eyes roam his body, taking in every delicious, ripped inch. There’s a neatly trimmed line of hair running down into his pants. The thought of what lies below that line makes her mouth water and slick flood her core. 

“You’re so wet,” Kylo says breathily, his chest is heaving as if he’d just run up a cliff and is about to jump off. “I want you.” There’s a hungry possessiveness in his voice that draws a keening noise from her lips. 

He makes quick work of her top, and lovingly drops a kiss to the center of her chest, and then… then her heat is on her in full. Something about the tone of Kylo’s voice takes her far away. She wants him desperately, she’s making soft little omega noises of pleading and wanting. 

He seems to lose his tremulous grip on his control at this, and rips off her sleep shorts. “Fuck, Rey, my sweet little omega.” 

“I’m so empty,” she whines. “Please fill me,” she breathes in his ear. Somewhere distantly, she realizes this is the last thing she wants to say to him. She was supposed to keep him at arm's length - but that doesn’t seem to be working out too well. 

“Fuck.” Kylo groans out, and he finds his way to the apex of her thighs with his mouth. 

He softens her with tongue and plush lips, and though she’d never revealed it to him it seems he knows she’s never gone this far with anyone else. The thought sends a shiver of pleasure down her spine, she wants to give this to him, her omega brain can only imagine more, more,  _ more. _

She cries out when he slips a finger into her core as he eats her, Rey’s breath coming in short pants, she’s not there yet, but she’s standing so close to the edge it won’t be difficult to dive in headfirst.

He splays his massive hand over her lower abdomen, it covers her belly and her mind goes to an impossible place… “Fill me with your pups.” She cries out, half-wild with desire for him, and if she thought he’d lost control when he ripped her sleep shorts, it’s nothing compared to the sound he makes, then does to her. 

His throaty, half-feral groan makes her grab his hair and massage his scalp wantonly. She wants him as close as one can be to another person. She needs him with all that comes with an omega needing an alpha. 

“I need you, now,” Rey demands. 

“As you wish, my love,” Kylo murmurs. He’s too quiet, yes, he is hard as steel against her thigh, and as she sees him spring free of his boxers, she wonders how he will fit inside her. As he lines them up and nudges her entrance with the head of his cock, she cups his cheek in a moment of tenderness. She sees the pain, the desperation, his  _ need _ reflected there, and it is like staring at the sun - and she is blinded by him. 

“Don’t be afraid, I feel it too,” she whispers to him, and then he surges forward into her, and she purrs his name in his ear, which is now directly next to her mouth. 

They are incredibly restrained for an alpha and omega bonding for the first time, especially a couple that has imprinted. Rey is  _ gone _ in his arms as he pushes them with every thrust of his hips higher toward oblivion. 

She gives as good as she gets, pushing her hips into his thrusts as he tells her over and over, “My good girl, my mate, my mate,  _ my mate _ .”

His strokes become slightly erratic, and he hits something sacred inside her and the world explodes into a riot of stars and sounds. Her erratic breath huffs against his shoulder, his thrusts becoming increasingly frantic as he chases his high, and all she can do is cry out.

And then he’s coming in earnest, and she feels his knot swelling between them, holding them together. She’d entirely forgotten that this happened when you were  _ with _ an alpha like this. The feeling which she’d thought would’ve been horrifying is subtly pleasant, and as his breathing evens out and he gives her ass an affectionate slap, he whispers, “You’re beautiful with my knot.” 

She flushes, even deeper than she already is, and kisses him soundly on the mouth. They lay there like that, the sweat on their bodies cooling and him whispering sweet words to her and her soft laughter in return. 

They shouldn’t get to be soft like this, and she knows it will ruin everything, but he’d offered to help and he had. She’d never felt so whole as when he was inside her. 

Over the course of an all-mighty hour their bond loosens, and she’s finally able to pull free. His seed drips down her thighs. All she can think is that she needs him now and always. 

*~*~* 

After they’d sated themselves on each other at least thrice, he’d told her she needed to get some water and fruit into her, just so they didn’t get too hungry and tired. She had never been around an alpha for her heat, and when he offers to feed her out of his palm, she is delighted. They repeat this for at least forty-eight hours. Eat, shower, fuck for several hours and then Kylo would sweet talk her into repeating the cycle. Her heat is gloriously short, which, some fact tickles in the back of her mind that it’s because she’s with her  _ mate _ . 

On the third day, she’s only slightly hot to the touch. She knows things have changed between her and Kylo. That the monster he pretends to be for the sake of the country and the sector will never align with the man who had cried out her name in sheer ecstasy. 

*~*~* 

They return to their lives with a shock on the fourth day after Rey’s heat had started. 

“Han Solo is dead,” Kylo looks very morose for someone who’d apparently just killed off (from what she knew) a very big problem for the First Order. He’s drinking, and it’s only noon. He’d come back from the Supreme Leader’s headquarters and poured himself a shot of vodka. 

Rey doesn’t know what to say. Surely, they can’t talk about this. She knows his personal space isn’t wired for sound like many dwellings are, but still, it would be stupid to talk about it here. She wants him to turn so badly, but she knows rushing it will result in the loss of the tenuous bond they have. 

“How — how did he die?” Rey asks, her voice shaking slightly, “And why do you care?” 

Kylo scoffs, and his words come out slightly strangled, “I don’t.” 

Is it just her, or is this all sounding a bit strange? But then Kylo’s spirit seems to split to the bone and he lets a tear roll down his cheek. Rey looks around nervously. She didn’t want this, she didn’t want him to do something he’d regret - but maybe his soul is beyond saving? 

“You didn’t answer my question,” Rey says softly, and there’s a measure of danger in her voice, she’s afraid she knows the answer to the riddle he’s presenting, “It was you, wasn’t it?” 

Kylo hangs his head and is deathly silent, tears rolling down his cheeks. 

“You— you  _ monster _ !” She seethes, and she picks up the bottle of vodka, fully intending to hit him right upside the head with it. 

Kylo reaches out with the force, and prevents her from hitting him with it. “He was already half dead when I found him,” his voice hitches, and then she feels renewed anger at him. “Han Solo was my father.” 

“No… no…” Rey is shaking her head, disbelievingly. His name is Kylo Ren, and he’s the Supreme Leader of the world. He is the utmost evil in this world. He cannot be the lost son of Han Solo and Princess Leia Organa. He cannot be the lost Prince of the country of Alderaan. 

He can’t be her only hope. 


	6. i have loved you all along

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their memories have always been one cohesive vision, she was just being blind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a smutty chapter (yes another one) and if you've read the shatter me series you'll see what I'm doing in this chapter!

*~*~* 

CHAPTER 6 

*~*~*

  
  


She has not been so furious in her whole life. She has turned half of the  _ Supreme _ suite to ash. Her chest heaves as she tries to catch her breath and stop destroying things. Her angry pheromones are clouding the air like smog. Her nose is full of them. 

Kylo is standing there, a little shakily. “Don’t think I’m not the monster you met in the street that day.” His eyes dart around, looking at the destruction. “Just… know that it wasn’t my choice!” His words come out in a pained gasp.

“I didn’t want any of this!” Rey rages and turns to face him, her hair flying in her face. “Why is my force power corrupted? I think you know.” Her voice is an unearthly shriek, and she wishes she could tame her emotions, but the force is feeding into her. She truly feels like she is going to lose her mind. She sucks in a huge gasping breath, “The Prince, he was our only hope, but now there’s nothing left worth saving because you could never be the one that was promised.” 

Kylo rubs the back of his neck, and as she goes to leave, to run out of this infernal suite, he catches her. And it occurs to her, albeit briefly, that there is now a gaping wound on his arm. He lets out a howl of pain, and she feels shaken to her core. What madness was this? She flees from him and shoves her gloves on her hands. “I’m sorry! Fuck, I’m so sorry.” 

He force heals the wound, although there is blood on both of them. Wasn’t that how this was always going to end…?

In bloodshed. 

She makes for the door, and he stops her. He reaches out, and with his hand on her shoulder, eases her back into the room. “It’s my fault.” 

“Nothing has ever been less your fault, I hurt you.” She’s not sure why she cares, but the bond between them is nothing like it was. She can feel their mate bond, and over the course of the past four days, it’s snapped firmly into place. 

Kylo presses a kiss to her forehead, and the guilt begins to eat at her in earnest. She had said she didn’t want things to change for a reason. This was too hard. 

He pulls her tight to his body, and she beats her little fists on his chest and struggles, but eventually, her wild sobs give way to tired little hiccups, and she settles in his arms. 

“You are everything I’ve ever wanted. Please don’t run from me.” 

She doesn’t know how to take that. Kylo Ren, the terror of the First Order, the most feared man of the generation, was begging her to not leave his side. She couldn’t help but catch the tremulous tone his words took. Maybe this was costing him as much as it was costing her. She  _ hoped _ it was. 

She sags against his chest and makes sure her gloves are on tight, and that none of her skin is touching his. She couldn’t bear it if she… hurt the Prince. 

But he wasn’t a prince anymore. 

_ Kylo was king _ . 

And then she realizes she can no longer, in good conscience, call him Kylo. He is the prince that was promised, the savior of the free people of the world.

_ He’s Ben Solo.  _

She’s still gripping him, hard, and she feels the corruption in her force power agitate. She steps away, scared to hurt him again. How could he turn his back on his people like this? 

Memories, so distant and often remembered, like photographs left to sit out in the sun and faded with use, she can barely remember them surface in her mind. A boy, with dark eyes and ears too big for his happy face. A mother, with golden-brown hair similar to Rey’s own, and flashes of the Princess’ tightly coiled braids. A smirk on a devilishly handsome man, who could only be a much younger Han Solo. 

And Ben… the boy who had pulled her pigtails on the playground, and that she’d force shoved out of her way to the water slide in the hot summers. 

It had always been him. 

It would always be him. 

She pulls away, and she’s not sure what she’s doing, but she leans into him and kisses him full on the lips. How had she forgotten the shape of his face? How had she not realized that he was the savior of the free world? What had corrupted her very soul to make her forget the shape of the hole this boy had left in her heart?

Then, as if him kissing her back had shaken the memories from her pockets, a flash of Snoke, Ben screaming for his mother, and Rey’s mother’s scream sounded in her head, as loud and clear as the day she first heard them. 

She’s so  _ hurt _ . So wounded, and Ben just holds her as her sobs of grief begin again. She is breaking into so many pieces, and she knows it won’t be the same after this. But she never wanted to hate Ben and had never known his fate. It makes her chest ache so badly she thinks she’s dying. And she can feel his wet tears on her cheek now, and they’re crying together great gulping sobs. 

Did he remember the time she shoved him so hard on the playground he fell and got that scar on his knee? She’d been beside herself, and she realizes Ben is looking at her, and he  _ knows _ . He remembers. He lifts up his right pant leg and shows her a thin scar, now much smaller than the ugly cut she’d given him. 

She holds him close to her, and whispers, “We’re going to be ok, I’ll fight, I’ll do anything.” 

He chokes on a half wrecked sob, “I know, and I wish I’d never let you go.” 

She pulls out of his arms and leads him down the halls of the ruined Supreme Suite and into his bedroom. 

“We shouldn’t,” he says, but she lets a wave of omega pheromones escape her. “I don’t want you to think that’s the only thing I want from you…” His voice is wounded, and she wishes she could communicate to him that hearing his voice break like that hurts her in ways she doesn’t dare acknowledge. 

“Ben…” she noses his scent gland, and drops a kiss to the sensitive juncture of his shoulder and neck, standing on tiptoes. “Please, won’t you show me how much the king needs his mate?” 

He gives a deep growl in his throat, and he uses his alpha voice on her as they enter the bedroom they’d shared the last four nights. “Get on the bed, my queen.” 

She looks away from him, she shouldn’t refuse a direct order from her alpha, but she seems to curl into herself, “Do you mean that?” 

“I’ve never meant anything more seriously in my life,” his voice is soft, and he’s abandoned his alpha tone. 

She lets a little mewl pass her lips, and she knows she’s a goner for him. She can scent his arousal and knows if this man had asked her to have his pups right then and there, she would’ve complied. He was her everything, and she wouldn’t be denied the pleasure of making him a father. 

And then, she’s stripping him of his clothes feverishly, she’s never wanted to be skin-to-skin with him so badly. Not even during her heat. She needed him inside her, to love him entirely and with a rapture that would make the stars rattle. 

She slips off his shirt, the last piece of clothing she’d removed from him, and feels something in her mind  _ click _ . It was a slightly jarring feeling, and she wasn’t sure how she could tell Ben, sweet Ben. She didn’t know the whole story yet, didn’t know what had been done to twist his heart into cruelty. 

“Don’t stop now sweetheart,” he all but purrs. 

“I think our mate bond just snapped into place,” She says, slightly breathless. She’s wearing too many clothes, but Ben soon puts that to rights. He doesn’t say anything and is suspiciously quiet, simply noses her scent gland and peppers kisses on her. 

“Ben, I’m scared, and you’re scared too, I can feel it.” 

“The First Order will kill us both,” his voice shakes as he holds her. 

“We’ll figure it out, together,” Rey said slowly, she removed her gloves and touched him lightly. Nothing happened, except Ben’s eyes fluttered shut and she placed butterfly kisses on his lids. 

He gets down on his knees and lays her down onto the bed, he roughly pulls her petite body to the edge of the bed and brings his mouth down on her core. She lets a low moan escape her lips and she feels pleasure course through her blood, they have always loved each other - and now is no different. Sometimes love wears the guise of hatred, the line between love and hate so blurred even Rey couldn’t see where one began and the other ended. 

She sighs deeply as he sucks gently on her pearl of pleasure, always gentle, but taking into account she was  _ not _ breakable. It’s sweet and she feels her heart-melting in her chest. She doesn’t want to face the world outside with him, she wants to stay in the Supreme Suite and worship his body forever. He gives a short little nip to her thigh and then licks her slit with the flat of his tongue. He seems to be enjoying it just as much as she is. 

Her first orgasm takes her by surprise, it is a tidal wave of pleasure, a tsunami after an earthquake’s worth of revelations. 

Ben groans as her juices cover his tongue, and he begins to line himself up with her entrance, but she reaches between them, and says, “Let me return the favor,” Rey’s voice is high and sweet, the sound of an omega obeying her alpha. She needs to satisfy her mate. 

His head tilts back as she wraps her lips around his shaft, and she realizes that he’s wanted this for a long while. She’s not experienced, and the sensation of his huge cock in her mouth is a strange intrusion. She hums softly as she sucks and uses her hand to stroke the rest of him while she sucks the perfect mushroom head of him. His cock… it’s the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen, and she gives a little whimper when she feels his fingers inside of her, pushing in and out of her in time with her mouth on his cock. Rey’s feral little whimper as he hits something precious inside of her nearly sends him over the edge, and he takes his cock from her mouth, “You’re pretty little lips are going to end this show before it’s even over.” 

She whines filthily and pats the spot next to her, she wants him to spoon her, her body is the perfect small spoon - and as he lays down beside her she thinks she might die happy if the galaxy were to collapse in around them right now. 

He positions her so he has access to her perfect, pink pussy and then pushes into her. Rey gasps and she shifts her hips so they’re perfectly joined and she has access to his mouth, they are a tangle of his too-long limbs and her petite frame. “Oh,  _ alpha _ ,” she cries out, as he begins to pick up the pace in earnest. 

In moments he’s fucking her hard, her breasts bouncing hard and her body bowed against the force of his strokes. She feels like she’s going to achieve nirvana, being with him is almost  _ too good _ . His balls are hitting her clit in such a way that it’s pushing her so high, she feels at one with the clouds. 

“Fuck, my omega, my queen, I’m not going to last,” Ben’s voice is broken against the wave of pleasure every one of his thrusts brings to her. 

“Me either,” she half sobs in pleasure. “Fuck,  _ yes _ , just like that,” she presses herself impossibly closer to him and he’s hitting that precious, sacred spot inside her and she can’t take it. She clenches around him, hard, milking him for all he’s worth, and she feels the world tilt slightly off its axis as if there had been a shift in the stars with the force of her orgasm. 

Moments later she feels his seed begin to fill her, and she slumps against him, breathing hard as if they’d just run a marathon together. 

He kisses her forehead and with a final jerk of his hips, he finishes filling her with his cum. 

“Can we stay like this today?” She asks, her voice slightly raw from crying out his name so much. 

“Can we stay like this forever?” He asks, and she giggles softly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave your thoughts, a kudos or subscription. it will make me soooo happy. I've started on a sequel to this (TTIR done being written), and it begins only a few months after the end of this fic *eyes emoji* really looking forward to you guys getting the final chapter.


	7. the rise of ben solo, the king of alderaan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey embrace their true destiny, and their roles as royalty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> may the fourth be with you loves!

*~*~* 

CHAPTER 7 

*~*~* 

The morning light is just shining through the window when she realizes Ben isn’t in bed with her. She gives a troubled groan and feels the stickiness between her thighs from their long night of lovemaking. She sighed with the realization that things would never be the same. There would be no going back to being enemies, no matter how hard she wished it. 

But Ben’s saber was also gone. Which she discovered when she padded into the kitchen and saw it wasn’t in its usual place. Ben never wore his saber in the house, not now. 

She feels a slight shiver run through her at the thought of Ben fighting without her. It troubles her mind and makes her feel a hollow ache, deep in her gut. She begins to look for a note, and there is one. 

_Getting the Falcon,_ it read. _Stopping to help some people on Crait, while I’m out._ _Asking for backup safety officers from this sector. It should just be a small crisis. I’ll try to be home for dinner._

So he was still trying to be Kylo Ren? That made her see red, but she keeps her gloves on and keeps her temper in check when she feels the anger surge through her. The damage done to the suite was still apparent, drywall turned to ash, tables, and chairs upended. She almost feels guilty, but there’s something in her chest, a feeling of deep unease, and she can’t tell what’s happening on the other side of their bond. He’s closed the connection. 

And suddenly she realizes the real reason he's gone to get the Falcon. He’s going to reclaim his place as the rightful leader of the only free country in the world. Her heart seems to stop in her chest, ringing with absolute certainty. But surely he wouldn’t go without her, would he? She’s out the door as soon as she can find her suit, and she ditches her gloves with only a moment’s hesitation. She feels the power coursing in her veins, it is her armor now, the only thing protecting her from the harsh reality of her situation. No one tries to stop her as she races through the hallways, trying to figure out the first place she should look for Ben. 

She gets outside onto the gilded sidewalks and sees people looking at her, smelling her distinctly omega scent. Ben hadn’t bitten her yet, she realizes suddenly. She was still at risk, without Ben to protect her, she was just another Omega ready to be harvested for the camps. She reaches inside herself and feels the power bubbling just below the surface there. With a bit of effort, she pulls it up and out of herself like a shield. The faces of the people around her are shocked, but they feel the destructive power, as any sensible person would, and turn away.

She’s off running, heading straight toward the hangar designated for the Supreme Leader. She hopes she can get some idea of where he’s gone. She comes rushing to a halt, nearly tripping over her feet, and the words come out her mouth before she can think. “Where is Kylo Ren?” She snaps viciously at the man in front of her who is now cowering away from the corruption in her veins. 

The man directs her to a limousine in the garage, which is running already, and he gives her a slightly off-color grin. She slides into the limousine without thinking, without trying to reach out with her power. She’s expecting to come face to face with the dark gaze of her mate but instead meets the sunken eyes of the one man she’d hoped to never meet. 

Emperor Palpatine sits in the limousine, a flute of champagne in his clutches. His fingers are only half-formed and she doesn’t want to think of what dark power holds him to this world. 

“So good to see you,” His face is twisted and strange, his nasally voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard, “I’d wondered if Kylo had been remiss in bringing you into the fold.” 

She inhales a sharp breath and feels, rather than sees, Kylo’s presence in the limousine as it begins to drive away. He is bound and gagged, but not struggling. From her vantage point, Rey doesn’t even know if he’s breathing. 

She reaches out with her hands to ruin the Emperor, to put an end to his reign of darkness, but his force power… it’s wrong. Just like hers. It’s so strange to feel such a similarity in the force signature, and then she realizes. She must be related to this vile creature. She’s not sure how that happened, but her power has no effect on Emperor Palpatine. 

“Let me tell you a story,” Palpatine begins, and as he takes her hand she feels the most unimaginable anger rise up in her. She doesn’t want to hear his story, and the limousine is moving at full speed now. She’s positively furious, she doesn’t know if Ben’s ok, and… the limousine goes over a bump and Kylo’s saber is jostled from its clip. The red saber, which she shouldn’t be able to call to her given her corrupted force power, is suddenly caught in a tug of war between her and Palpatine on opposite ends of the limousine. 

Her will is strong, and she hears Ben’s voice in her head _Take back your power,_ she hears him whisper to her. She reaches out with her heart and her mind, with the love Ben has given her and steals back the power she was robbed of. She is the queen that would rule for a thousand generations, she would be the queen of Alderaan, and she would burn this whole maker-forsaken planet to the ground if it pleased her. Something clicks, a rightness ringing in her chest. 

She is whole again, and she easily overpowers the evil creature opposite her. The cross-guard saber flies into her hand and she ignites it, killing Palpatine with a single downward swipe. 

There is an abundance of blood and the car swerves violently, flipping over the guard rail. Rey hadn’t been wearing a seat belt, but she holds on with her newly rekindled use of the force. She keeps Ben safe in a protective bubble, and when the limousine settles at the bottom of the ravine, she climbs out without so much as a scratch. She floats Ben out and checks his breathing. He’s out cold but otherwise unscathed. She inhales and smells chloroform, explaining why he’s still out cold. As Rey gets Ben out into the night air, she can smell gasoline. She thinks quickly -- she needs to get them away from the damn car before it blows. 

She has no phone, but as she uses the Force to move Ben his pockets empty and she gets a hold of his expensive cell phone. Who should she call? Surely the authorities will be here any moment… she decides to call the only person she knows will definitely help her. Poe Dameron. 

His voice is slightly slurred when he answers. “Who’s this?”

“It’s Rey,” she says impatiently. “Look, I can’t explain right now, but I’m in trouble and I’ve got the Prince of Alderaan with me. We need to find a freighter, the Millennium Falcon, and get over to Alderaan’s capital.” 

“I don’t hear from you for six weeks, kiddo, and you’ve got the Prince of Alderaan with you?” His tone is disbelieving and shocked, although relieved to hear from her. 

“Don’t ask questions, Poe. I missed you but now is not the time. Can you meet us in the financial district in fifteen minutes?” 

“Fifteen minutes —?” His voice is shocked, that’s a long ride, but they both know he can make it. Poe can steal any scooter or motorcycle nearby as easily as breathing.

“I’ll see you then.” She says and hangs up. Ben’s beautiful face is blinking up at her and she gives him a watery smile. He looks shaken and tired, but otherwise alright. She lets go of his force signature and he drops evenly to his feet. 

“I knew you could do it,” he says, scooping her up into his arms. 

She kisses his cheek sweetly, standing on tip-toe and clinging to him tightly. “I couldn’t have done it without your saber -- it really saved the day.” 

He gives her an easy smile and she hands him back his crossguard saber, but he touches it and recoils. She grabs his hand and sees there’s a scorch mark. She takes a piece of Ben’s cape and wraps his injury. It’ll do for the moment, but they need to get out of there. She doesn’t have time to think, but can’t help but let her mind stir. The last time she’d touched Ben’s saber, her force power had been activated... or had it?

“Does anyone touch your lightsaber?” She bursts out, as Ben is trying to hurry her along the freeway. His cheeks turn red, and she realizes how that sounded. There’s a huge pile-up, and people are staring at them. Several safety officers are arriving on the scene, and Rey knows they have to get out of here _fast_. 

“Only in battle,” he says easily as they run, and Rey suddenly realizes what happened. 

“Did you and Palpatine fight before you found me?” she asks. A blaster bolt zings past her shoulder - the safety officers had opened fire on them.

“Yes, we were always clashing,” Ben says and ducks out of the way of another blaster bolt. 

“I think Palpatine force-cursed your saber,” Rey says breathlessly. They’re running at a clip now, and it’s becoming painfully obvious that they won’t be able to outrun their pursuers. The blaster bolts are now flying freely, several getting close enough to singe her hair and clothes as they run along the freeway. She sees how far they are from the financial district and groans. Palpatine’s driver must have been going at quite a pace to get this far, this quickly. 

She breathes deeply, feeling the burn in her lungs and the stitch in her side. She tries to focus on not scenting fear, as she knows it will distract Ben. 

There’s a distant rumbling, a low, long growl emanating from the Earth and sky. Rey sees the rebellion’s symbol in the sky. Poe has come with reinforcements! She doesn’t want to think how many people will lose their lives tonight, but her best friend has come through and she’s infinitely grateful for whatever insane sacrifices he’s made tonight. She waves to Poe, trying to signal to him that they’re there. They’re alive, and so is the spirit of the resistance. 

Poe provides cover with a barrage of blaster fire and lets down a rescue basket. 

“I’ll carry you!” Ben shouts over the cacophony of blasters and helicopter blades. The melee is becoming overwhelming and they need to get out — Ben lets out a cry and she screams, their force bond echoing his pain into her shoulder. He’s been hit... Summoning all her strength, she gets him to the basket, but he shrugs off the wound and she nearly collapses trying to get him into it. Ben cradles her now exhausted body and pulls them into the chopper when they get inside. 

Poe doesn’t notice or doesn’t care, that they have Kylo Ren on board. Ben lays in the back of the chopper, blood dribbling out of his wound. Rey is relieved to see Rose, her other best friend, who immediately begins helping to patch Ben up. 

“So you’re the one who sent out the beacon,” Rose says, as she pours a quick clot into his wound. Ben bellows like a wounded lion, and tears leak from the corners of Rey’s eyes as she feels his pain through their bond. They’re getting further and further from the battle though, which is a good sign. 

Ben nods though, as he eyes his wound, which has now stopped bleeding and simply looks angry and red. “I didn’t know if it would work.” 

“The Resistance and Alderaan were always friendly,” Rose says. “Why wouldn’t we respond to your call?” 

“Because I’m—“ 

Rose gives Rey a look and points to Ben, “He’s cute, but he’s not as smart as he looks,” Rose laughs, in that way only Rose Tico can, despite all the odds, no matter the circumstances. Rey curls into the crook of Ben’s arm, and she kisses his cheek sweetly. 

The outrageous noises of battle are far away now, and they seem to be headed for the international airport. Poe manages to land the damaged chopper and sets them down in front of a familiar freighter that can only be the Millennium Falcon. 

There’s a woman standing in front of the Falcon. Her hair is loosely curled and is liberally streaked with grey. “My grandson,” she says in greeting, and as Rey jogs to keep up with Ben’s long strides she realizes this must be Padme Skywalker, Ben’s grandmother. 

Rey stops mid-stride and watches as Ben lifts his aging grandmother off her feet and spins her around in his arms, “You’re here!” he laughs. “You’re really here.” Ben sets his grandmother gingerly down on the tarmac. He seemed ecstatic to see one of his only living family members. The happy grin on his face feels like the sun is finally shining on them. 

“The ones who love you will always be there,” Padme replies, “to support the king.” Her voice is tender and soft, Rey pats Ben’s broad back, her small hand going to the small of Ben’s back. Happy tears stream down her face, and she tries to blot them out of the way. Rey shakes Padme’s hand and Padme pulls her in for a tight hug. 

Rey takes Ben’s hand, and together they walk up the steep gangway of the Falcon and into their future. 

  
  


*~*~* 

Epilogue

*~*~* 

She’s not sure what she’s expecting when she gets to the beach on Alderaan, she certainly wasn’t expecting Ben to look like he had bad news. She knows where she is, realizes this is her mating vision, and she can’t help but feel a little weary. The war is only just beginning, and Alderaan is weak, it’s military disjointed from years of hiding and making itself small. 

Ben has both hands in his pockets, and they’re both just orphans, trying to make their way in a world that doesn’t want them. 

She sighs, “If you wanted to break up with me —“ 

He shoots her a sharp look, “Baby — do you really think that’s what I took you to my family’s private beach for?” Her dark hair is unbound, and flying in the salty sea air. She wears a dusky pink sundress, and light sandals, the air here is so light, _but her heart is heavy._

Ben takes her hand there are tears in his eyes, they have such a long road ahead of him and whether or not they’ll both make it is unknown. 

But the only way they can do it is together, so he gets down on one knee and holds her hand in his. “I know…” he gives a little rueful laugh, “I know this isn’t what you dreamed about, it's not what anyone dreams about, but I want this. I want to take the road less traveled and see where it delivers us. Whether that’s ruin or eternity, I don’t care much. I want you, Rey, because you were never anything less than perfect to me. Would you do me the honor of marrying me and being the queen of Alderaan?” He offers her a great, pink diamond, the kind that can only be forged hundreds of miles below the surface of the earth, with the Force applied to it to give it a perfect gleam. 

She inhales sharply, “Ben… I….” But then she gets down on her knees in the soft sand with him and realizes that she cannot possibly use words to express her gratitude and her love. She kisses him and whispers, “Yes, always and forever, _yes_ , Ben.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has been a really emotional journey for me. I'm overwhelmed at how this story was received and there will be a sequel! Please subscribe to my author profile if you'd like to be notified when the sequel posts, it should be in the next several days! There is art being commissioned for this as well and I'm going to post it [here](https://softkylos.tumblr.com) when it's done. You've all waited long enough for this! I love each and every one of my readers! This is the first WIP I've ever finished!
> 
> Edit: 6/13/2020 the next work in this series, which will be a three fic series can be found by clicking the link that says “please don’t shoot me for this (abo & dystopia verse)” on the work. It should also be at the end of the work. Enjoy!


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